August 11, 2004 - No More Chemo
In the closing scenes of the film, The Shawshank Redemption, the character Red, describes his giddiness at being free to choose to visit his friend Andy. Though breaking his parole, he was free to do just that. A feeling, he mused that must be known only to truly free men. As that may be, I have experienced that same elation twice in the past 18 years. Both events represented getting out from under a situation that seemed without end. Leaving the Oncology clinic, I felt so light and relieved that keeping my feet on the ground was a chore. Today is one of my best days in a long time. Why? I stopped chemotherapy permanently. I will continue the weekly blood tests. Every four or five weeks I'll meet with my oncologist to assess my status. We will order CT Scans every four weeks. So I should have a good set of data to ascertain just how things are progressing. We rushed through a CT scan on Tuesday morning, with the hope the results would be ready before our (Carolle attended this time) meeting with the oncologist. The results were not much different. No change in the number of tumors greater than 25mm. The two large tumors have increased in size. The one I call Henry is now 77mm which is up from 69mm. The spleen has enlarged a little more. They remarked on reportable atelectasis (collapse of a small portion of the right lung). For the first time they reported a small 11mm cyst on the right kidney. It is interesting to me, that the lung and kidney issues were not even mentioned during our meeting. Only after receiving my copy of the report did I notice it. Lastly there still exists considerable free fluid in the abdomen, called ascites, caused by the cancer changing the chemical balance of the liver. Earlier I said that August 11 would be my decision point. Of course, it was. In fact though the last chemo session I had was July 14 through 16. Despite that period, I still have side effects from the chemo drugs. My oncologist prescribed a pill called Gabitril to deal with the nerve damage in my fingers caused by the Oxaliplatin. The script calls for taking this drug in increasing quantities for an indefinite period. It seemed logical to ask, "Why take this given I am stopping the chemo?". Surprise !!! The answer was, "Some of the effects don't always wear off." Isn't that a nice piece of news? Regardless, here are some of the updated CBC results: range date of test test low high 07/14 07/21 07/28 08/04 08/11 wbc 3.5 10.5 5.20 3.44 2.91 3.46 4.48 neu 3.5 8.0 3.50 2.04 1.66 1.92 3.13 rbc 3.1 5.4 4.93 4.32 4.35 4.32 4.34 hgb 14.2 18.1 12.3 10.9 11.0 11.0 11.1 hct 37.7 53.7 38.5 34.3 34.5 34.4 34.5 plt 142 424 106 86 82 76 97 The following table shows some of the metabolic results, indicating liver functions: range date of test test low high 06/30 07/07 07/14 08/04 08/11 ast 6.0 37.0 46 56 61 88 81 alt 5.0 55.0 55 64 73 96 89 alp 50.0 136.0 288 354 396 514 535 alb 3.4 5.0 3.2 2.9 2.8 2.9 2.7 cgt 0 85.0 215 266 300 289 290 So what are my plans from here? Well, the oncology clinic has on staff a doctor specializing in nutritional solutions for cancer patients. His regimens accommodate those folks who choose to supplement their chemotherapy programs as well as those who wish to use them to replace chemotherapy entirely. Several months ago, he put me on a couple of natural supplements that greatly reduced the bleeding mouth and digestive tract sores, caused by the chemo. That in itself creates some sort of confidence foundation. He will work with me to architect dietary guidelines now that I am off the chemo. He feels there are alternative therapies that affect the cancer by changing the environment, without destroying the host (me) as part of the cure. In the few days following my decision to terminate the chemo, two interesting news tid-bits surfaced: Quite curiously, the oncologist said, during our meeting, that the chemo, not the cancer, was killing one of his close friends. Apparently she suffers from a Stage IV cancer that has metastasized to her liver. A few days later, we read an article on the front page of the business section, that described the risks of Avastin: death and heart failures. The company spokesperson acknowledged there had been deaths, but could not estimate how many were directly attributable to only the Avastin. Some wonder drug !! At this point, I am feeling better each day. Some of this, no doubt, results from having made that decision. But some of it is the effect of the chemo slowly working its way out of me. Sure I will still have some bad days. For the most part though, I am feeling more in control and much more part of the world around me. It is a good feeling.

 

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